At first there is only light and silence. Then, my blurred vision focuses. I am in a bright room, flooded with light. It is rectangular, long-drawn-out. On one side are huge windows. There is nota single sound to hear. I am looking at a thick canvas, hanging on a tall rack. It is dirty, worn and washed out. I step forward, not paying attention to the rest of the room. A brown leather armchair is positioned about two meters away from the canvas. I halt and frown. I don’t like it. An uneasy feeling rises inside of me. It reaches from my stomach up to my throat, clutches it, squeezes it. I close my eyes and swallow.
And swallow again.
I don’t dare to move or make a sound. Try to suppress my rising concern. Then I hear a light chuckle. So familiar and warm, so suddenly that I gasp for breath. A soft voice speaks my name. But I still don’t dare to move. Why? I don’t know. Maybe I am afraid to risk a glimpse and realise the voice is just an illusion.
Eventually, I open my eyes and see Rosie standing behind the chair, moving one leg slowly over the backrest. Her elegant foot is stretched and touches the seat softly with her toes. Her long fingers rest on the backrest. She wears a black silken cardigan. It is almost transparent, and the buttons are not closed. I can see her favourite black underwear set. Her long black hair with a red shimmer falls over her shoulder. She looks right at me.
My heart stops. I am waiting for her to say something. But the silence is back, vibrating in my ears, I can hear my own heartbeat now.
With a slow, elegant move Rosie pulls her leg over the backrest und sets the foot lightly on the ground, behind the other one. She closes her eyes and her left hand moves up to her face. It starts to caress her cheek. She bends the back of her body into a curve, the right hand still sitting on the backrest. She moves the hand through her hair and while watching her I start to feel aroused. Memories of Rosie’s skin on mine, the warmth of her body, the noises she made when I grazed her body hit me hard. I start to breath heavily because I miss her. I am not whole without her. She made my life an adventure. Something I never felt before. And then she left me.
All those thoughts are storming back into my mind, while she leans forward over the backrest and grips the armrests, putting her head down. Stunned I am watching her throwing her head back, with closed eyes, her mouth slighty opened. It reminds me of those moments when she was sitting on my lap and leaning back, so I could kiss her skin upward to her chin, her lips. It lights my desire even more. And I feel more abandoned than ever.
I blink and Rosie is sitting on the chair. It reminds me of the first time I saw her. She leans on one armrest, her legs pulled up onto the seat, one hand resting on her knee. We met a friend’s house and she was sitting just like this on the sofa. She was watching some comedy show on the TV when I entered the living room and was laughing, so she didn’t notice me at first. I was stunned by her sight. By her laugh. I instantly knew that I wanted her to be a part of my life.
Rosie looks at me and chuckles again. She knows what I am thinking about. Her hand moves down over her leg and she sends me a teasing look.
Then her legs are hovering in the air, while she strokes with her hands over them. Her eyes are closed. The profile of her face reminds me of all those moments when she was lost in thoughts sitting next to me. Those moments when she would forget everything around her, when I watched her with rising admiration. With growing love. Happy memories. In those moments I felt complete.
Rosie is sitting sideways on the seat now, leaning her back at one of the armrests. She pays no attention to me, slowly I feel myself moving towards her. I need to feel her again.
Her head tilts back and her long hair is falling down, nearly touching the ground. I go down onto my knees before this elegant woman who moved me like no one and nothing ever moved me. She put her feet back on the floor and looks at me. A little smile flashes over her face.
I felt something soft and warm in my face. When I opened my eyes; I saw a woman kissing me.
“Good morning, sleepyhead”, she smiled at me. I blinked, the memories of my dream stung. My consciousness was still in this bright room with Rosie. The woman laying next to me in my bed kissed me again.
“What about breakfast?”
I was confused. I couldn’t remember her name.